Spiritual Testing


This is a super important topic for all those who are sick, have been sick, or feel challenges arising in their lives. I am one of those people.

I used to be under the illusion that I knew when I was succeeding in my spiritual journey because my life would be smooth, easy, and all good things would just come to me. All the negativity and challenges would fade. I have come to realize it is the opposite. In fact Master Sha shares with us that his teacher used to tell him, “The spiritual path is a cruel path.” This is because of spiritual testing which exists to purify us.

You might recall from my blog entitled, “The Answer to the Question Did Theo Die” when I went to India I asked the saint AMMA (Bangaru Adigalar) to be purified, and that is when my life really turned upside down. I did get purified and continue to. As such, every dark corner of my mind, body, and soul is being flushed out. This means my reality is being turned upside down so that I may be blessed with, and walk in, grace.

Understanding this has been a God-Send for me. For I previously thought I was doing something wrong. Knowing about Spiritual testing is liberating. It shows me that I am indeed being taken seriously by the Divine for there is no real growth without it. How else is the Divine suppose to know when I am ready for real spiritual power and knowledge unless I am tested? After all, I know I do not want to abuse power and knowledge. The higher I go in spiritual standing, the farther I have to fall. And I have fallen. And it is NOT pleasant! So I want the testing to make sure I can handle the new spiritual responsibilities.

So, if Spiritual Testing is so uncomfortable, even painful, why invite it into my life? The answer is simple. The greater the test, the greater the reward. For example, in my blog Miraculous India I was tested before meeting AMMA at his temple in India. After passing the test, I experienced a heart opening that was nothing less than a miracle itself. I have been equally tested in my studies with Master Sha.

For example: Leaving to go to the Soul Enlightenment retreat last month my flight was bumped five times while I had a Migraine headache. After spending all day in the airport with a migraine I eventually had to buy a ticket to Phoenix, then to Chicago, to then catch my flight out to Canada for the retreat. I did not take any medication for my Migraine either to remain as pure as I could for the retreat. My mind really wanted to give up, but I didn’t, and I saw why once I arrived at the retreat. I grew more in two weeks then I had in the last year and I have not had a migraine since.

At the retreat I went through three more major tests. The first two were belief systems that I was just convinced were…they way life was. With the help of Master Sha and Delphi Amritam, I eventually saw the light, confronted my fear, and came out on the other side. I saw my Soul double in size before my eyes, Master Sha gave us all Soul Enlightenment, and more! What Master Sha offers us is truly beyond my imagination, I did not really get that until I spent some time with him and saw it with my own eyes. I am not the same person that left for the retreat. A freedom was bestowed upon me that I have no words for. I have such immense gratitude and appreciation for him. What I also love about Master Sha’s teaching is that he is giving us, his students, the tools and knowledge to pass this Spiritual testing so we can move forward quickly in our purifying. I have tears in my eyes with amazement and gratitude for this.

Our minds simply cannot comprehend the depth of the Divine. This is why it takes Faith in a Master to guide us into the unknown. Faith is NOT choosing to believe an idea that sounds good….that is delusion. Faith is choosing to believe in reality beyond the minds comprehension. Enlightenment is functioning from the spiritual reality, from the soul, with the mind following the soul’s direction. Or as Andrew Cohen used to say, enlightenment is living by intuition alone.

The way to this enlightenment is by passing spiritual testing! So bring ’em on!


6 Responses to “Spiritual Testing”

  1. Gary Jones Says:

    I hesitate to post about religion because the issue can be so volitile for poeple and it will be very hard for me to state my complex point. first please believe:
    I in no way wish to detract from what you have put but rather to add to it.
    This path of heroic testing i think is a point of view born of a not perfectly healthy ego. It is actually a rather negative point of view that the “self” or ego needs to be conquered by a hero in an epic battle of testing and pain. enlightenment is something that requires no such violence agains self.
    It is not the ego or the self that needs to be tested or purified but rather only the unhealthy ego could be seen this way. If we do not make this differentiation early on and simply heal the broken ego (no need for heroic testing) we run the risk of creating a view of the world with a fundamental broken dualtiy at its core. There is no reason why we cannot create a fully non dual vision of existence without attacking ourselves first.
    conscoiusness and self awareness itsef is a function or the beauty of seperation that creates the universe. There is no reason to fight with ourselves over it. Life IS good already !

  2. Martin Says:

    I am very interested in your thinking and experience. Could you describe your understanding of “enlightened music”? (I saw it in another post)

  3. Theo Wanne Says:

    Hi Gary,
    Thank you for your insights. I understand and I agree with your point regarding Heroic Testing.
    Spiritual Testing and Heroic Testing are different though. Spiritual Testing is not a self-imposed test on one-self. It is not putting up barriers in one’s life, to then feel better about one-self when conquering those barriers.
    Spiritual testing is like proving one is capable and responsible in a job before getting a promotion. There are benefits to getting the promotion, which is why we want it. However, it would not be kind to give someone more responsibility in their job who is already struggling with their current work load. This is why spiritual testing is not negative, it is actually very compassionate. Spiritual Tests exist both as an opportunity to get the promotion AND to protect us when we are not ready for more responsibility.
    Spiritual testing exists to see if we will choose:
    • Compassion instead of Self-Rightousness
    • Faith instead of fear
    • Love instead of Anger
    • Our inner knowing instead of our mind’s logic
    For example: As we deepen in spiritual growth, one becomes more fearless, because we know the inherent perfection of all things as they are. This knowledge is powerful, as the fear to do what want in life disappears. We can then CHOOSE to assist in furthering good in the world, or be empowered to meet our selfish needs at the expense of others. This is why with power comes responsibility. In this example the responsibility is to be compassionate and caring in our fearless choices. A very selfish person with this knowledge is a very dangerous person. Look at many of the most devastating people in the world and you will selfish, yet powerful people. However, if a person has a very pure ego and is interested in helping others, the power of fearlessness can assist them in helping a lot of people.
    Acknowledging this has brought great peace to my life, because I now have an understanding and compassion for the process.
    Also keep in mind that people are very addicted to their minds and habitual ways of doing things. Changing those habits’ and learning to function from Divine guidance means functioning in a new way. And just like any addiction, there is withdrawal pain attached to choosing a non-addicted life.
    Thinking we can change with no withdrawal pain is just not how it works whether I want it to or not. But I can have understanding and compassion for the process.

  4. uma maheshwari Says:

    hi theo,
    iam an ardent devotee of AMMA(BANGARU ADIGALAR).would u be kind enough to share ur experinences u had with AMMA how HE purified u with me.i like to listen to ppl who can share their experiences..thanks..

  5. Garrett Says:

    Theo please call me when you come to San Francisco so I can introduce you to my reiki family circle, many of whom have also met AMMA. I have played your pieces for ten years and would love to explore life deeper with you!!! (Deeper than the telepathy which we already have)

  6. Jane Watson Says:

    I really like your blog! You have wrote a really wonderful article on migraine. Thanks they are a great help!

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