Redefining Perfection

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     My definition of perfection has changed over the years. For much of my life I have held strong ideas of what perfection looked like. I had a picture in my head of what something would look like when it was perfect. When something met that picture, perfection was achieved.

    For example, once I spend an entire year setting up a house to meet all my pictures of my perfect residence. It had a stream running alongside it that made those wonderful babbling brook sounds. My shop had ceiling high windows that overlooked the backyard which was like a Zen Garden. I remember the morning I had the thought, “Wow! The house is finally perfect.” 

That very same day my wife at the time and I decided to separate and we each decided to move out of the house to live individually. Doh!

    I also remember when I finally found THE perfect vintage saxophone for me, after years of playing different horns. Because the horn was so special to me I had a professional start an overhaul on it immediately. The next day I got the following message, “Theo I am so sorry but while wire brushing the neck of your horn, the tenon caught the wheel and tossed the entire neck across the room, buckled it over in half.”

    I have many examples like these in my life.

    Finally, one day I asked myself. Why do I create this? Why is it every time I experience getting something perfect (meeting my picture of perfect) does it almost immediately depart from my life? The answer I got was profound for me: to learn to experience the perfection inherent in every moment. That’s right, this moment right now; not just when life meets my pictures or ideas of what it should look like.

    I am slowly getting better at accepting things (and myself) exactly how they are. I now recognize it is only my desire for life to be different that has ever cut me from the feeling of perfection. Living in perfection in every moment is my, and everyone’s, birthright.

    I went to bed last night asking for a good example of this. In the middle of the night I awoke knowing I had to locate my cell phone right way. Instead of ignoring such an odd feeling I got up to look for it. I realized then I hadn’t seen it for over two days and really had no idea where it was. I picked up the home phone and called the number walking around the house listening for my cell phone ring. Nothing. Then I thought about checking the garage. I walked in the garage stuck my head in my car and heard the cell phone power off. Silence. I heard just enough to know where to look. I found my cell phone under the floor mat in the back seat. If I had waited until morning to look, instead of trusting my knowing to look then, I would have never found my phone.

Letting go of how I think things ‘should’ be, and working with how things are allows me to experience the perfection of NOW! This means trusting what is happening around me, and trusting myself to act outside the confines of my mind. The more I do this the more I simply watch myself act, instead of control. And this is when the magic happens!

I don’t know why anything in life really happens the way it exactly does. But in trusting life the way it is, and in trusting myself beyond my ideas of how things should be, I am finding perfection. Instead of chasing perfection, I practice allowing perfection. What if it really is this simple!?! I know my life is working better and better and I am accomplishing things I never previously dreamed possible.         

Blessings, Theo Wanne

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2 Responses to “Redefining Perfection”

  1. ian Says:

    hey theo you described how i feel. i always feel like im waiting for things to be perfect before i allow myself to be truly happy. of course that perfection seldom happens as i want it. if you have advice on how to start letting things happen and loose control please email me. id love to chat. ian.

  2. Theo Wanne Says:

    Hi Ian,

    Thank you for your comments. I feel you!

    I practice curiosity. I ask myself, “I wonder why things are happening the way they are?” Just this act of curiosity helps loosen up my control.

    Sometimes I even get an answer, and I see the gift in what is happening now, no matter how uncomfortable. Usually I see a mechanism of life, such as the law of attraction: what I focus on is what I will get more of, etc. This is good becasue I can then work ‘with’ the mechanisms of life instead of just feeling like a victim to them. Another thing I often see after asking is that I am in a process that truly has my best interest at heart, then patience is easier because I see it is moving me where I wanted to go anyway.

    Ultimately I see that things really couldn’t be any different than they are now and that my current experience is exactly what I need to move forward in my life. Then I get grateful for how things are, and the perfection that was always there is experienced.

    So there is my process. The key being the curiosity for me.

    The other practice I do is meditation. I start each meditation with, “Everything is exactly as it should be. Nothing needs to change or be different. I have nothing to do, or fix. Everything is as it should be.” Then through relaxation, staying present, and patience that experience is then had.

    I now know that that is who we all are ultimately. Holding that knowledge and experience in every moment is my lifes practice:)

    Blessings, Theo

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